One day at the end of class, Little Johnny's teacher asks the students to
go home and think of a story, to be concluded with the moral of that
story.
The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their
story. Little Suzy raises her hand. "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday
we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at
the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out
of the basket and onto the road."
When the teacher asked for the moral of the story, Suzy replied, "Don't
keep all your eggs in one basket.
Little Lucy went next. "My dad owns a farm too. Every weekend we take the
chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only 8 of the 12
eggs hatched."
Again, the teacher asked for the moral of the story. Lucy replied, "Don't
count your chickens before they hatch."
Next up was Little Johnny. "My uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war, and
his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it
crashed, but could only take a case of beer, a machine gun, and a machete.
On the way down he drank the case of beer. Then he landed right in the
middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but
then he ran out of bullets! So he pulled out his machete and killed 20
more. Then the blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with
his bare hands."
The teacher looked a little shocked. After clearing her throat, she asked
what possible moral there could be to this story.
"Well," Johnny replied, "Don't screw with uncle Ted when he's been
drinking."